Documentaries are often a great way to get insights into worlds that are foreign to us, that’s why I was intrigued by the offer to view this documentary by Tom Wiedlinger. It’s both a historical as well as personal film about his enigmatic father, the acclaimed structural engineer Paul Wiedlinger who fled Europe just ahead of the Holocaust, but kept a secret from his family, including his own children, that he was Jewish. He found out about his father’s secret, and his own identity, through his cousin when he was already in his 40s. Naturally, it’s a revelation that rocked Tom’s world and to make matters worse, Paul denied it when Tom confronted him about it and they never talked about it again until Paul’s death.

Architects Paul Weidlinger and Pista Haas in a tableau, staged and photographed by Madeleine Weidlinger. (1940, La Paz, Bolivia)

That wasn’t the only familial trauma Tom endured as a kid, as his mother Madeleine was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia which led him to run away from home in his pre-teen years and later live in a boarding school. The film offers an honest look at a man in his 60s trying to piece together his family history and confront past trauma that he spent decades trying to run away from. Making this film is perhaps a cathartic experience, as Tom used part of his late father’s inheritance to trace his father’s footsteps across three continents. One poignant scene shows Tom walking along the Shoes on the Danube Bank memorial in Budapest to commemorate the Jews who were massacred by fascist Hungarian militia during WWII. 

Tom Wiedlinger’s years of investigation led to a book of the same name that was released in 2019. The film would serve as a perfect accompaniment to those who have read the book. It includes interviews with people who knew his famous father and meeting Jewish relatives he didn’t even know existed. Those scenes are interwoven with reenactments of his childhood with his father. Even though he spent time with his father, Tom described the experience as ‘together but apart’ as his father seemed aloof and kept a lot to himself.

Paul Wiedlinger’s own story is fascinating–he taught himself to read at the age of 4 and became a communist at 14 (even got arrested at 18). At the height of his career as an engineer, Paul was revered and feared by those who worked with him, and he came across as a brilliant but detached, standoffish person. He had a deep love for space and a knack for math and science and later befriended Herman Kahn, the notorious American physicist who inspired the character of the cold war satire Dr. Strangelove.

Director Tom Weidlinger with actor Samu Bagi who plays the director at age twelve.

I have to say that this isn’t the most riveting documentary. The pacing is a bit slow and while there are moving aspects of the story, it was a bit tough to grasp and follow at times, even with the help of the filmmaker’s narration. That said, I appreciate the honesty presented in regard to issues about mental health and generational trauma. As my own father wasn’t present for most of my life, I can relate to the filmmaker’s quest to reconcile his fractured relationship with his dad. Despite his rather ‘distant’ relationship with his father and other traumatic experiences, I don’t sense any resentment on the filmmaker’s part, as he seeks to understand his father’s journey that affects his own past. Tom himself came across as warm and open-hearted, as evidenced by the heartfelt nature of the documentary.

Ultimately, Tom Wiedlinger’s goal with this film is that he wants his family to feel ‘seen’ and I think he achieved that.

You can watch The Restless Hungarian on Tubi and Prime Video.